It is winter and I am hibernating. Many people use the end of the year to reflect and to start making their New Year resolutions. I like to use this time to be more intentional with my growth, health, life and specific goals for the next year. Through-out the year, I often add, subtract and assess as the seasons change.
In the spring, I take off running because that is when I am most alive! As soon as the birds start singing, I am born anew. I have recently learned that this is actually the way nature intended for us to move. We should mostly hibernate in the winter, sow in the spring and summer and harvest in the fall. Society had us all fucked up with this New Year new me b.s, and we wonder why most struggle to see results.
Over the last few years I've ventured into this transformative stage where I have come to recognize that old habits, once used for survival, are no longer conducive to my current growth and journey. The practices that once brought me comfort, usually by way of distraction, no longer do so. This has forced me to find other ways to stay balanced, healthy and filled with joy.
After publishing my first book, Pimpette Chronicles: A Modern Black Woman's Guide to Dating Safely and Navigating These Mean Streets. I became extremely motivated to learn, grow and read as much as possible. I figured if I was going to continue publishing books (especially ones offering advice) that I would need to really expand my knowledge and vocabulary in addition to mastering my public speaking skills.
I began re-exploring topics regarding political science, spirituality and psychology. I also read memoirs from powerful Black Women but only the ones that I respect and admire. Last night, after days of reading until I was exhausted, I finally finished Viola Davis ``Finding Me". I have never been much of a Viola fan, but after watching her performance in The Woman King, I became enamored and wanted to learn more about her life and her work.
The moment I delve deep into this book, I could tell that the writing was of her own voice. Some of the memoirs I have read in the past felt heavily edited and had lost some of what I can only describe as being "the author's soul".
In those books, the personality did not come across on the pages which I attribute to the author perhaps not being a true storyteller or not having a strong enough voice in the editing process. After writing my own book, I understand the importance of this stage in publishing, better than I did before.
While reading Finding Me, I felt as if Viola was speaking to "me" directly! She honestly and brutally shared some of the most intimate and horrific parts of her past. Sometimes, I felt as if some of her topics were repetitive, but as I continued to read, I learned that there was a purpose for that.
I found myself shedding tears of pain and love for the little girl that she was, and the woman she has become. Refreshingly, I even found a resemblance of myself in her thoughts, fears, and understanding. Especially when she talks about how our society views and treats Black Women. Specifically, those of us who carry the darker shade of brown.
In this love letter to Black women, she made it clear that we were not imagining the biases and prejudices that we see in the media and that many of us encounter in our everyday lives. Her battle to be seen in a world that tries to make many of us feel invisible is inspirational and relatable.
Finding Me touches on abuse, racism, the effects of internalized self-hatred, and even reveals yet another one of the movie industries notorious practices of discrimination. She lays it all out intricately yet brutally for the world to see.
Tinisha D.Brugnone
www.pimpettechronicles.com
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